Sleep. Ahhh. Such an amazing, wonderful, comforting, rejuvenating concept. Other than hot showers, amazing food, peeing after having held it much longer than you should have and…a few other things…I’m not sure there’s a sensual equal to the awesomeness of pure and unadulterated sleep. Yet, despite all of its bonuses, I certainly don’t want to sleep my life away. I just want the sleep I do have to be amazing. Because other than being hungry, fatigue is the most direct avenue to my alter ego, The Angry Bear.
Unfortunately, I’ve recently realized that one of my true loves in life, besides sleep, is preventing me from sleeping soundly. The evil yet magical…deep, dark and dreamy…
There’s nothing quite like the routine of coffee creation and consumption. No matter how much sleep I get or how sound that sleep is, each (and every!) morning I wake up groggy and angry about being awake.
Yet, I’m okay. Because I know that in the not-so-distant future, I will be sipping a warm, deliciously creamy beverage that will transport me from the realm of the Undead to the realm of the Living. I always scoffed at the idea of smokers being just as addicted to the routine of smoking as they are to the nicotine itself. Until I tried to give up caffeine… Now, perhaps even more than craving the drink itself, I crave measuring out my espresso, heating up the stove, boiling until just right, pouring, creaming, sweetening and then sipping my way to daily readiness.
And, yes, I tried switching from regular coffee to decaf. But, this didn’t do it for me. I went from not sleeping at all to sleeping better-but-still-not-good. And I have been consuming coffee regularly (and sometimes in obscene amounts) since law school. So, I don’t know why this has hit me all the sudden. I’m guessing just another unfortunate factor of getting O.L.D.!
Despite my love for coffee and the routine of creating it each day, I know I must part ways with it. Because the lack of sleep is interfering with all different elements of my life. My workouts, my diet, my productivity, and my zeal. Good sleep is one of the most fundamental elements of happiness in your personal and professional life. See what inspirational words Arianna Huffington had on this subject when giving a TED talk a few years back.
But, this breakup is proving more difficult than my worst separation from an actual human being. My dedication hardens. And then waivers. And then hardens. And then evaporates, And then hardens. And then waivers… And my question remains unanswered…
Should I be well rested or utterly heartbroken?